He is just so Ugh!
by miss concieved
Summary: Clare is off at boarding school, there is a new guy that likes to ruffle her feathers. I smell something... could it be a match made in heaven, or a burnt out plot line? you tell me.
1. Watch it!

A/N: This will be a multi chapter story... my first story ever. so please to harsh reviews. i will be updating two times a week.

i hope you enjoy!

stay awesome -_-

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Chapter 1: watch it!

Buzz!

The loud alarm awoke me from my dreams. I sighed and turned off my alarm. **7:01 a.m. **Ugh! Summer vacation is finally over, all too quickly. "CLARE! You better be awake. Your plane leaves in 3 hours." How could I forget? Today was the day I fly back to Rothman Academy of the Arts.

I have been waiting all summer to get back to school. The books, the classroom, the writing program there is so amazing. Oh my, I do sound like a geek. Well, I guess they don't call me Saint Clare for nothing.

I jumped out of bed and grabbed my clothes. I ran to the bathroom and turned on the hot water. I got in and let the water run over my body. The hot water soothed my muscles. I got out and towel dried my now short auburn hurls. I transformed this summer, and I wouldn't come second to any girl this year.

It is out with the old. My hair is now short and curly. My clothes have had an upgrade thanks to my best friend Ali. And my old geeky glassy are no longer needed due to the fact I had laser eye surgery. In the words of Ali, I have taken my look from saintly, to sexy.

"Clare Diane Edwards, you better be down here within the next minute of you will miss your flight," my mom yelled.

"Gosh, mom, I'm ready," I stated descending down the stair case.

"Oh, another 6 months without our baby girl, Randall. Can you believe she is so grown up?" my mom gushed.

"No, but she isn't fully grown just yet. She still needs us for something…Oh who am I kidding my baby girl is all grown up."

"Will you guys relax? I've going here since I was in grade 9, I'm a junior now. I'll be fine. We just really need to catch our flight."

"Okay baby girl, we are leaving."

* * *

The ride to the airport was short and sweet. My parents kept talking about how grown up I am. I exited the car, and kissed my parents good-bye.

The process was quick and I just barely made my flight. I put on my head phones and prepared for departure.

Before I knew it I was out cold. So the 3 hour plane ride went by extremely fast. When I woke up we were preparing for landing. I got up from my seat and stretched. I collected my things and got off the plane.

When I was waiting at the baggage claim a random person ran into me.

"Hey! Why don't you watch it!" I said angrily.

"Sorry, I was pushed. God what is up your butt?"

That made me mad, nothing was up my butt. I turned around and was face-to-face with the most beautiful green-eyed boy I have ever seen. I momentarily forgot my angry.

When I remember I was mad I shook out of my trance and glared at him. "Why don't you get some manners," I asked.

"Will do Madame," he said sarcastically.

"Good boy," I retorted and turned back around.

I could almost feel his eyes burning a hole in my back. But I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of me turning around.

I quickly grabbed my things and made my way to the school.

* * *

The school was crazy cluttered with students. Everyone was squealing when they saw their old friends. I just rolled my eyes. I got my class schedule as was very pleased.

_Period 1: grade 12 Adv. English… Ms. Dawes_

_Period 2: Creative writing… Ms. Dawes_

_Period 3: Gym… Coach Armstrong_

_Lunch_

_Period 4: Media Immersion… Ms. Oh_

_Period 5: Calculus… Coach Armstrong_

_Period 6: U.S. History… Mr. Perino_

My schedule was fairly easy. I had Ms. Dawes last year, and she was a good teacher. Tough, but fair.

I looked up my room assignment, Maxwell Hall room 482.

I got to my room and was instantly attack by a squeal. I looked up and saw Ali sitting on one of the beds in my room. "Ohmigosh! We're roomies!" Ali yelled.

"Yay!" I said with little enthusiasm. Don't get me wrong, I love Ali. She just is a handful sometimes. With all the squealing and the boys and the drama. It can be a lot to handle.

"Come on Clare bear, you can do better than that."

"Woo," I said unenthusiastically. I gave Ali a look to tell her I was just joking. And we both busted up laughing.

Man this school year was going to be the best.

"Hey Ali, let's go get some coffee at The Dot."

"Sounds good to me."

We grabbed our purses and made our way across campus. Just as I was about to open the door, someone bumped into me.

"Hey, watch where you're going," I said hastily.

"And you say I could use some manners. Why don't you be a little nicer." Wait a minute that voice sounds very familiar. I turned around and there he was, the obnoxious boy from the airport.

"I am nice. You just rub me the wrong way."

"Oh so now you are thinking of my rubbing you… Kinky."

"Wh- ummm... NO! I was not thinking that. You are totally twisting my words."

"Ha-ha. Do I make you nervous, blue eyes?" he asked with a sexy intensity.

"N-no," gosh Clare why do you have to stutter.

"Whatever," with that he turned and walked away.

I walked into the coffee shop and sat with Ali. She was looking at me with wide eyes and a shocked expression.

"He is just so… Ugh! You know," I said frustrated at what a guy I don't even know could do to me.

"Clare I get you are in love with him. So, who is he?"

"Some jerk, that ran into me at the airport and I yelled at him. No! I am not in love with him. He is a complete stranger."

"Whatever you say Clare bear. Whatever you say."

This year sure will be interesting. I just hope I don't see that boy again. Or maybe I do. Oh gosh. How can a complete stranger do this to me? I really don't like. Oh well. This year is sure to be interesting.

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**Epic Fail? you tell me. please review:]**


	2. First day no way

**A/N: So here is chapter i hope you enjoy this small peice. **

**Disclaimer: I own my teddy bear Mr. Pebbleton's i do not own Degrassi**

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Buzz!

Ugh! My alarm is so annoying. Time for school! At least I have English and writing first. I love writing it puts me at ease. Hmmm. It is time to get up, but my bed is so warm!

I finally got out of bed and put on my first day of school outfit, picked out by Ali. One pair of dark wash skinny jeans, an off-the shoulder bright blue shirt, and cute black wedges. Too complete the look, I curled my hair into messy perfection. I let Ali tackle the daunting task of my make-up. In the end I was very pleased with the way I looked. She kept it simple to my likings. Gold shimmers on my eyes, with my lashes lined by mascara. My lips looked luscious with bright pink lip gloss. I am most definitely first day ready.

I checked the clock and realized I was going to be late. I rushed to class and made it just as the bell rang. Most of the seats were filled so I took one at the back of the class. As soon as I got situated Ms. Dawes walked in and greeted the class.

"Good morning, my over achievers. Today, I will be assigning writing partners. This person will be your partner for the rest of the year, so play nice."

I hope I get someone good. I zoned out until I heard my name. "Clare Edwards, you will be partnered with Elijah Goldsworthy."

The boy in front of me raised his hand. "I actually go by Eli, if that's fine with you."

"Of course, Eli."

Hmm. That voice sounded so familiar, but I couldn't put my finger on it.

"Okay class! It is time to get to know your partners. So take the next hour and just talk."

I tapped Eli on the shoulder, "Hi, I'm Clare."

My partner turned around and I was stunned speechless. Him. I couldn't believe it was him. Eli was the green-eyed jerk who kept running into me. Well, he looked stunned by my appearance as well, because his mouth was hanging slightly open and his cute green eyes were wide with shock. Wait, whoa, whoa, whoa… did I just say his eyes were cute. Oh god. No, that is not good. I can't think that!

"Well this should be fun," I stated.

Ms. Dawes walked by and heard my statement. "That is the spirit. I think we have a very great pair. Like Sylvia Plath and Ted Hughes."

"Sylvia Plath killed herself," I said dryly.

I laughed to myself as the whole class Oohed.

Eli and I really didn't talk for the rest of class; we just sat there and stared at each other. I felt as though his piercing green eyes were staring straight into my soul. It was kind of awkward how intent his gaze was. I watched as his gaze began to travel down my body. At that point I couldn't keep the blush off of my face. I turned away and heard him chuckle to himself. Ugh! He so did that on purpose.

I was way too embarrassed to look at Eli again, so I just began doodling in my notebook. I successfully drew five stick figures. I was staring at the figures and realized I am a horrible artist. That shouldn't surprise me, I don't draw.

The bell rang and I watched as the other students left the classroom. I didn't need to leave; since I had Ms. Dawes next. I looked up from my notebook and realized Eli wasn't moving either. "Shouldn't you be heading off to your next class?" I asked him.

"I am in creative writing next, looks to me like you are as well."

Oh goodness, another class with Eli, how will I ever survive the next year of my life? I just hope that we wouldn't be writing partners again. But, it just seems like luck isn't on my side. I watched as Ms. Dawes crossed the room towards us. I was silently praying she wasn't going to say what I thought she was going to say.

"Ah. Clare and Eli, I see we are both in creative writing as well as English. Since you two will be editing each other's work in English, I am going to go ahead and make you partners in this class as well."

"Ms. Dawes is that really necessary? I don't really need a writing partner, you know how well I am with my writing," I said praying to get her to change her mind.

"Clare, your early work last year was divine, but you lacked substance. You can't hide behind vampire fiction forever," she said. I think she just wants to make my life miserable. I heard Eli laugh at the vampire fiction; I just hope he forgets about it.

"I am not hiding," I stated stubbornly.

"Good, then prove it to Eli." With that said she turned and headed back to the front of the classroom before I could protest anymore.

Shortly after the class began, it was pretty much the same as the first class only instead we had to describe our partner by what we know. At least she said this will be confidential so I don't have to worry about what he says about me, or him seeing what I think about him. My essay pretty much went like this:

_His green eyes are staring into my soul. He makes me mad, he makes me flustered. Yet, there is something about him that seems so inviting. It may be his sarcasm, or it may be his mysterious aura. Whatever it may be, I want to know more._

Okay, so that isn't much of an essay, but we aren't turning it in so I think I'll stop there. I look up at Eli, and he only has about a paragraph, so he isn't much better than me.

The bell rings and I quickly walk out of class. Only to get stuck with Eli at the door. He looks at me and smirks, as he pushes past me. So much for ladies first. Man, his smirk was pretty hot. No! No, Clare you cannot be thinking about him like that. Too you he is only your jerk of an English partner. Someone you are forced to work with not forced to like.

The rest of the day went by quickly. Lunch was spent with Ali, while she sized up the new boys on campus. And I am proud to say that Eli isn't in anymore of my classes.

By the end of the day I was wiped out. I got back to my hall, took a shower and went to sleep.

As far as first days go, this one has been pretty darn interesting.

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**A/N: So how goes it? if you don't like it, well i don't know why you read it in the first place, but hey you won't have to read it ever again... concept-_-**

**if you did like it... there is a review button below, and it giggles if you push it!**


	3. Invading my dreams

Invading my dreams

I sadly do not own Degrassi or it's characters, i do own an awesome kellogg's smacks t-shirt

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My night of sleep was not as peaceful as I wished it to be. Stupid Elijah invaded my dreams.

_Eli and I were sitting in the library. I was laughing at something he said. We were the only people there; it was seriously like a ghost town. "Hey blue eyes, what are you thinking about right now," Eli asked. Blue eyes? Where in the world did he get that nickname for me?_

_I sighed and looked over to him. He was smirking at me, the one that is so sexy. "I was just wondering where everyone is, there aren't people around."_

_"Hmm. I guess there aren't. Lucky for us though."_

_"How so?" I inquired._

_When I looked back up at him he was leaning closer. I was surprised to find myself involuntarily leaning in too. "Don't play dumb blue eyes, I know you like me. Just look at you, you are dying to kiss me right now," he said oh so cocky._

_Our lips were inches apart, when the worst thing happened. My alarm went off._

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My mind has been so screwed up since then. I didn't even pay attention in English, or creative writing. I avoided Eli at all costs. Secretly hoping he would forget we were writing partners. As I was walking to lunch, I felt a hand on my arm. I turned to see just who was beckoning me. Of course, it had to be Eli. "What do you need Eli, I'm hungry."

"Geez, just need to remind you we have to edit our assignment. I say we meet at the library tonight, around 5ish." Oh no, not the library.

"I can't make it tonight," I said quickly.

"Well, what is more important than our English grade?"

"Um, well. Uhh, I am meeting some friends."

"You suck at lying, but okay. I understand you are scared to be alone with me, it's cool."

"UH! I am not scared to be alone with you. In fact I will be there at 5, jerk." After that I got up and walked away. I'll show him I am not scared.

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5 p.m.

I walked into the library and was instantly relieved to find people. At least it isn't like my dream. I spotted Eli at a table near the back writing in his notebook. I sat across from him and sighed to get his attention. He looked up at me amused. "Wow. I'm surprised you actually showed up."

"I said I would be here and here I am. Now let's get this done."

"Okay so the assignment is to write about change. I am writing about pain. What are you going to write about?"

"I was thinking gun control."

"Wow, controversial."

"Well I say it's good. Besides, what do you think I should talk about, oh wise one."

"Something that pisses you off. If you could change one thing in your life what would it be?"

"My parents. They don't exactly get along. They act like they are happy when I'm around, but I hear them fight behind their bedroom door. I'm so scared that it will end in divorce."

"There you go write about that."

"It is personal, Elijah."

"Ouch, full name you must be serious. But, seriously, write about it. You care too much about what other people think."

"I'll think about it. I will have a paper for you to grade tomorrow morning. Okay?"

"Alright, where you headed in such a hurry?"

"Well, nowhere just back to my room. I didn't sleep well last night."

When I said that he began to laugh at me. I was so confused nothing is funny about not being able to sleep.

"Let me guess, sexy dreams about a certain person. Say a writing partner?"

What, how did he know? Oh no. Oh my gosh, wait. Be cool. He can't know what I dream about, he is just bluffing. Trying to ruffle my feathers.

"Ha-ha, no. I would never dream about you. Let alone have it be sexy."

He started laughing as he got up and swung his back pack over his shoulder. This is the first time I really looked at him. He was wearing black skinny jeans, a grey button-up, black vest and a black tie; he was like the very definition of emo. Even his nails were sharpied black. His hair was grown out and shaggy, it kept falling into his eyes and he had to flick his head to fix it. Who am I kidding; he is sexy, even when he isn't trying.

"Keep telling yourself that, blue eyes."

Oh goodness, the nickname from my dream. With that said he walked away still laughing to himself.

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I walked back to my dorm room obviously upset, how could my dream be so similar to that. At least we didn't kiss. I unlocked my door and saw Alli sitting on her bed painting her nails.

"Hey Clare bear what's wrong?"

"Eli, he is such a jerk off."

"That is because he likes you," she stated matter-of-factly.

"Alli, this isn't second grade. If he liked me he wouldn't try to piss me off."

"Clare, take it from someone who knows a lot more about boys. He is so into you. Boys our age still act like second graders. They have this delusional outlook on the world of girls. They think that the meaner they are to you, the more you'll want them. And from the looks of it, Mr. Eli's plan is working. You are so smitten with him."

"That is so not true. Do I look like I'm smitten? I don't think so, more like thoroughly irritated."

"You can't keep denying it."

I rolled my eyes and opened up my laptop. I signed onto my face range account and noticed Eli was online. I was about to click on his profile when my IM alert bleeped.

**Eli_Gold49: **_Hey Blue eyes, we need to edit each other's papers still._

**Clare-E23: **_Yeah when and where?_

I was so annoyed I had to see him again. Alli notice my slight irritation. "What's wrong now?"

"I have to see Eli to edit his paper."

"Face it you are so in love."

**Eli_Gold49: **_Are you busy tomorrow?_

**AlliTheGreat: **_Clare and Eli Sitting in a tree… in love!_

**Clare-E23: **_Nope, no plans, are you up for a morning coffee?_

**Clare-E23: **_I am not in love_

**Eli_Gold49: **_Love? What are you talking about?_

"Oh my god! I sent Eli the wrong message!"

"Ahh!" Alli screamed, "What did you say?"

"I am not in love."

"Oh goodness, not too bad you didn't say his name he doesn't know it's about him."

My computer kept bleeping at me, I looked down and noticed Eli had sent me 3 more IMs.

**Eli_Gold49: **_I'm guessing that wasn't for me_

**Eli_Gold49: **_Hello, anyone home?_

**Eli_Gold49: **_EARTH TO BLUE EYES?_

**Clare-E23: **_Sorry that was for my friend, want to grab coffee tomorrow morning?_

**Eli_Gold49: **_Yes, tomorrow at 8_

**Eli_Gold49 is offline.**

I shut my laptop and went to sleep.

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**A/N: Well there you go… Chapter 3 your turn time to review. That is one button that likes to be pushed! Adam is introduced next chapter! he is very funny!**


	4. Coffee with a side of sarcasm

You people are wonderful i'm glad this story is getting lots of hits..

Winter break is sooo boring. why is it that when you are in school, you want it to be break, but when it's finally break you miss school?

i don't own degrassi, but i do own my thoughts.

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Coffee with a side of sarcasm.

I checked my phone, 8:13 a.m., Eli was late. I swear, if he wasted my time I am going to be so pissed. I started packing up when, I heard the door chime. I turned to the door and saw Eli standing there laughing with a boy I didn't recognize. They made their way to the table and sat down.

"Sorry I'm late, I ran into my buddy Adam and lost track of the time."

"It's fine, nice to meet you Adam, I'm Clare Edwards," I said while shaking his hand.

"I figured, Eli keeps talking about his English partner, nice to know he wasn't making you up."

So Eli was talking about me, I wonder what he was saying about me. Probably that I was weird or along those lines.

"So Clare did you go with the parent idea?"

"I'm not sure yet, I want to write about it, but it seems too personal," I stated.

"I know something else you could write about," Eli stated humor was evident in his voice. I was kind of nervous for his answer.

"And wh-what exactly might I-I want to change?"

"Oh I don't know, maybe the fact that you aren't in love," Eli laughed. Ugh! I was so embarrassed; I can't believe he is mocking me. "I'm going to get a coffee, do you two want anything?" Eli asked.

"Get me a hot chocolate, extra whipped cream," Adam said.

"Vanilla latte for me please."

Eli walked away to get our drinks, I jumped slightly when I heard Adam chuckle to himself.

"What's so funny?"

"You two, you guys are so in love," Adam said amused.

"No we aren't we can barely stand each other."

"Don't deny it Clare, embrace it. I see the way you guys look at each other when the other isn't looking. If you're scared that he doesn't like you back don't be, as I said he talks about you. It is actually quite nauseating to listen to."

Before I could respond, Eli came back with our drink orders. I smiled up at him, while he just smirked at me. I swear he doesn't know how to really smile; it's just that stupidly cute smirk every time.

"Well, Clare it was nice meeting you, but I must be going. I feel like a third wheel, and frankly it is giving me the runs. You two have fun working on homework."

I laughed as he retreated out of the coffee shop. That boy was one interesting character.

"So Clare decided on a topic yet?"

"Although, writing about my nonexistent love life may be fun for you, I'm going to pick my parents."

I opened up my laptop and began to type. **(Insert Clare's epic paper) **

About an hour later, I had finally finished. I looked up at Eli, who was bopping his head to his music. I caught his eye and handed him my laptop.

I watched as he looked over my paper.

"Wow, Clare how did it feel to write this?"

"Honestly, I felt exhilarated."

"This is definitely amazing."

"Thanks, can I see your paper now?"

He rummaged through his bag until he found what he was looking for. He handed me his paper and I began to scan it.

_Pain is a part of everyday life. Everyone has felt it at one point of another. Whether you stubbed your toe, or got into a fight, pain is all around us. However, I believe that the pain that hurts a person most does not come in the physical form, but the emotional. When a person dies, they leave the ones close to them to grieve the loss. I very recently lost a person close to me, and have suffered great grief. If pain were eliminated, then people could accept the loss of their loved one and move on. If pain ceased to exist, the people who suffer from depression could lead normal lives once again. If pain stopped hurting us, then we could stop living careful lives. However, pain does exist and it will always hurt people._

It was wonderful. I couldn't help it, my heart ached for the boy who irritated me.

"It is beautiful Eli."

"Don't go all 7th Heaven on me now. But thanks I'm glad you liked it."

We sat a little while longer; I couldn't help but wonder who he lost. The curiosity got the better of me and I had to ask him about it. "Eli, I'm sorry if I offend you, but who did you lose."

"A person close to me," was the only answer I received before he bolt from the coffee shop. I sat there dumbfounded for a few seconds contemplating what actually just happened. I wanted to go after him, but by the time I regained the ability to move he was out of sight.

I packed up my belongings and exited the coffee shop, all alone.

As I walked back to my dorm room, I spotted Adam sitting alone. I walked over and sat down beside him. "Hello, miss Clare. How was the homework?"

"Fine, up until Eli ran out on me."

"What did you do to upset him?"

"I asked who he lost, after I read his paper. I was merely curious, I didn't mean to upset him."

"Well won't you look at the time, I must be going now," Adam said in a rush. He started to get up, but I grabbed his arm and pulled him back down.

"Oh no you don't. I need some answers and you are going to give them to me."

"I can't tell you, if I could I would, Eli will let you know when the time is right."

"Fine, I just wish he didn't take off so fast."

"Aww! Does little Clare have a crush on Eli," Adam mocked in a baby voice.

I reached over and smacked Adam across the head. "I'll see you later, Adam, tell Eli I'm sorry."

"Will do, Mrs. Goldsworthy."

I walked into my room, and fell onto my bed. Tomorrow morning would be interesting.

**

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A/N: so there you have it… See the little button down below, if you do what it says, I get all tingly inside.

**Preview to next chapter:**

"**I might like you."**

"**You're beautiful."**

"**What's going on here?"**


	5. Don't I know you?

**A/N: Woo! that was a fun new years. happy 2011 everyone. **

**I don't own degrassi, but i do own a picture of munro chambers, it is on my wall -_-**

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Don't I know you?

I walked to English with my head held high. I figured I would tell Eli how I felt. I just don't want to get rejected. Adam did say he liked me too. Oh goodness, I'm nervous; butterflies are out of control in my stomach. Well I need to do it. I need to know if Eli likes me back.

I got to class and saw Eli in his usual seat, I sat down silently. Eli turned around and smiled at me. I breathed a sigh of relief. "Good morning Blue eyes," he said, a smirk playing on his lips.

"Back at you Mr. Goldsworthy, are you doing better this morning?"

"That I am, I'm sorry for running out on you, you just hit a sore subject. I talked to Adam last night, and he helped me sort some stuff out."

"That's good, want to grab lunch," I asked hopeful.

"Yeah, that's fine by me," he said.

Before I had a chance to reply Ms. Dawes entered the room and began class. I didn't get a chance to speak to Eli until we were leaving creative writing two hours later. Let me tell you, when you want to get something off your chest it doesn't help when the person you need to talk to is sitting in front of you, and you can't even speak to him.

"So blue eyes, meet me at the Dot."

"Okay bye, Eli," I said a little too cheerful. Oh gosh, I sound like a school girl with a crush, no worse, I sound like Alli.

Eli laughed and walked away. Lunch couldn't seem farther away. Every time I looked up at the clock, it mocked me only moving minutes, when it felt like hours. I just wanted to see Eli again and tell him how I feel.

Finally I was released to lunch. I made my way across campus and into The Dot, Eli was already there at a table I walked up, and sat across from him. "Hey Eli," I said trying to sound nonchalant.

"Hi Clare." Wait, no blue eyes?

"So, I want to tell you something, but you can't laugh, I am being 100 percent serious, okay?" I said, suddenly consumed with nerves.

"Um, kay?"

"I might like you," I finally blurted out. He just sat there staring at me. What did I just do, he obviously doesn't like me.

"Um, Clare I don't know what to say. I like you too, but it is a bad time to get into a relationship. We should get to know more about each other before we just jump into a relationship."

I felt crush, and stupid. "O-oh. Well that's fine I-I guess."

"I'm so sorry Clare, I just need some time."

"I should go," I said hurriedly. I got up and ran out of The Dot, I ran all the way until I ended up in front of my dorm room. I leaned against the door and began to cry. I couldn't believe I was so stupid, I should have just kept my feeling to myself. He said he needed time, so I'll give him time.

**

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**

One Month Later

"Eli, you are being so dumb," I yelled.

"No I'm not you're being naive."

"Stop telling me I'm naïve, you are just being a jerk," I took off away from Eli. I had grown accustom to these little tussles. One of us would say something offending, usually Eli, the other would get mad and we would start name calling.

I sat on the ground against the English building's wall. I had just begun to cry, and start my pity party when I felt a presence next to me.

"Why is a girl as pretty as you crying all by herself?"

I looked up and saw a cute boy, with short brown hair sit next to me.

"I am not pretty."

"You're right," he stated. I stared at him incredulously.

"Excuse me?"

"You're beautiful."

I couldn't help the blush that started to burn my cheeks.

"I'm Mark, but everyone calls me Fitz."

"Clare, it's nice to meet you."

"The pleasure is all mine, miss," he looked at me and smiled. A real smile not that stupid smirk.

"Well Clare, I must be going but here is my number, I would like to take you out sometime, just call me."

Fitz got up and walked away. I felt stupid sitting alone smiling. I'm sure people passing by thought I was a freak. I got up and brushed myself off.

* * *

**Later that night**

After a long discussion with Alli, she convinced me to ask Fitz to dinner.

I picked up my phone and cautiously dialed the number.

"Fitz speaking," he said.

I laughed, "Hey it's Clare, would you want to catch dinner with me tonight?" I ask hopefully.

"Yeah, what hall are you in I'll pick you up in an hour."

"Maxwell Hall, room 482," I stated.

"See you soon Clare."

"Bye Fitz."

An hour later, he picked me up. He looked very handsome.

"So I am going to take you to the steakhouse on First Street. If that's cool with you."

"Sounds amazing."

Dinner was amazing, and the conversation hardly stopped. I excused myself to the bathroom. As I was entering I saw a very familiar looking person washing their hands. I think I know her. I swear it looks like Adam, but why would he be in the girl's bathroom. The girl finished washing her hands and started to walk away. She looked at me and stood frozen.

"Adam," I whispered.

"Um, I, ugh, I can explain," I recognized the voice, it was Adam. Why is he dressed as a girl?

"Adam," I said again, dumb struck.

"Clare, you can't tell anyone. Please. I'm an FTM, female to male transgender. You know like a dude between the ears. I'm Adam 100 percent. Except when grandma comes to town, my mom doesn't want her to know. So I play Gracie, the loving daughter."

"Oh, okay. Well' that's cool."

"You won't say anything right."

"I am not one to gossip, besides you're my friend."

"Okay, oh gosh Clare. It feels so good to let you know."

"Does Eli know?"

"Yeah I told him a while ago. Speaking of which, how are things between you two love birds?"

"Actually, I'm on a date with this guy, Fitz," I said shyly.

"No! You can't let Eli know. They are like sworn enemies, they hate each other."

"I can see whoever I want, Eli made that clear. Besides it is just a date," I said getting mad.

"We should get going before your date realizes you've been gone a really long time," Adam said snottily.

"Fine by me."

As we were walking out the door I rammed into someone. I immediately went to apologize, when I looked up to see emerald eyes staring back at me.

"What's going on here?" Eli asked.

"I told her everything," Adam said.

"Well that's interesting. One less thing to hide," Eli said nervously, "Clare, why are you here?"

"I, Um, well; you see the thing is… I'm- I,"

"Spit it out Edwards,"

"I'm on a date with Fitz. Who I must be getting back to, bye," I rushed away from the two as fast as I could. When I got back to the table Fitz couldn't tell I was flushed, or nervous. I looked back to where the earlier seen had just played out. Eli and Adam were still there, Eli must have sensed someone staring at him. He looked up and his eyes glared into mine. I had never seen him so angry. I'm dreading school tomorrow.

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**A/N: Well there you have. press review and get a cookie... well an imaginary cookie, i don't bake.**

**Next Chapter:**

**"You don't own me."**

**"Clare listen, to me please."**

**Bum. Bum. Bum.**


	6. It's My Life

**A/N: Sorry for the wait. Things got bad at home and i had to move.**

**Depression sucks, now everyone looks at me like i'm diseased.**

**but I'm back now!**

**I don't own Degrassi, but I do own a dream journal... i am part hippie!**

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It's my life.

Fitz escorted me back to my room after dinner. He was a complete gentleman, which surprised me. I don't see why Eli hates him. I went to unlock my door when he stopped me. I turned towards him and looked into his eyes. Brown, not exactly the green I wanted to see, but they will do. He looked down at my lips and then back to my eyes. He is going to kiss me. He lifted my chin and began to get closer. When I thought he was going to kiss me, he turned my head and kissed me on the cheek.

"I had fun Clare. I hope we can do this again very soon." He turned around and began to leave.

"Why didn't you kiss me?" I asked.

He looked at me and smiled, "I didn't want to push my luck with you, Miss Clare."

I think my heart just said, Awww!

I walked up to him and kissed him. He seemed surprised with my actions, but soon responded with an equal amount of excitement. His tongue grazed my lower lip and I opened my mouth returning the favor. His hands made their way to my waist, while mine wrapped around his neck. I ran my fingers through his spike hair. We finally pulled away and looked at each other. He rested his forehead against mine.

"Good night, Clare."

"Sweet dreams Fitz." With a kiss to my nose, he walked out of my dorm and into the night.

I walked into my room and leaned against the door. I took a deep breath and held it in. that kiss was amazing. I couldn't believe it was actually real. Alli looked at me expectantly. I couldn't hold it in I looked over at her and squealed as she has done so many times.

She got off the bed and squealed with me. I couldn't do this with anyone else.

"The kiss was that good?"

"You have no idea!"

**

* * *

3 Months Later**

I walked away in a huff. Fitz was pissing me off, once again. We keep getting into stupid fights. I'm just waiting for the big one, to end it. This time it was my stupid English partner, Eli. Fitz hates Eli, for reasons unclear. He just said something about a fight, cops, car skull, and an I.D. I have no clue what any of that means.

I met Eli at the benches in the courtyard to go over each other's papers again. Hopefully Fitz wouldn't interrupt again. Luck wasn't on my side. All was going well up until Fitz walked up and grabbed me by the arm. He pulled me around the side of the building. I looked into his eyes thoroughly confused. His eyes were hard and full of hate.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" he asked. His voice dripping with anger. I couldn't help but cringe at the words he used to speak down to me.

"Work on my English essay, what does it look like?"

His hand came across my face with a loud, _SLAP._ My cheek immediately burned. I wanted to cry, but he wouldn't get the satisfaction of seeing me cry. "I told you I didn't like him. That means that since you are MY girlfriend you don't see or talk to him."

"When did we go to the 1800's? You do not control my actions. Besides, Eli is just my English partner, nothing more. We don't converse about anything other than each other's papers and assignments. That is what Miss Dawes assigned us to do. If we don't we fail. I will not fail. Ever!"

"You will do as I say. Stay away from him. You will go over to him and say you can't be seen with him anymore. Then tomorrow you will tell Miss Dawes that you and Eli got into a really bad fight and you can't be partners with that scumbag. You will do whatever you need to get as far away from him as possible. Got it."

I looked into his eyes for any hint that he would let this go. Nothing, well there is a surprise. He always was relentless. I wish the sweet boy from a month ago would return and take away this loser. I had to stand my ground I wouldn't let him walk all over him. "You don't own me."

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me Fitz! You don't own me and I'm done!" I yelled. I went to walk away, but was slammed into the wall.

"Don't talk to me that way," he said in a low voice. I hand came up and slapped me across the cheek again. The side of my face stung. I looked back up and saw that Fitz was gone. I looked around and saw Eli and top of him.

Eli punched him in the stomach repeatedly. Fitz wasn't giving up though. He kneed him in an area where a guy never wanted to be harmed. Eli rolled to the side and held his jewels. Fitz got up and kicked him in the side. He looked over to me and walked away.

As soon as he was out of sight I ran over to Eli. "What can I do?"

"Don't- touch….. Anything," he said between gasps. I couldn't help but smile. Even though he was in excruciating pain he looked cute. We haven't talked much in the past 3 months, and it hurt me not to.

Eli finally regained enough composure to get up and walk to the bench.

"Are you okay?" I asked hesitantly.

"Are you? How could you let him hit you and not stand up for yourself? You were about to let him do it again weren't you?" He was made at me.

"I just got hit by my boyfriend, someone who just kicked the bejeezus out of you and here you are yelling at me? You are seriously messed Eli. I don't know why I even bother with you. It is obviously a lost cause."

"Clare, there are things about me you don't know. Things that I can't tell you. It is for the best if we just stay English partners."

"Screw you gosh darn insecurities and secrets. Do you really think I would judge you? Because, you know I would never do that."

"One day I will tell you everything. I just need to be ready when I do."

"Okay."

"Clare, how long has he been hitting you?"

Why did he have to ask that question? Couldn't we just move on and forget it ever happened. I like that option. I couldn't not tell him I needed him to trust me. So I did what I didn't want to I told him the truth. "About a month now. It was great at first, but then little things would set him off. It started with him grabbing onto my wrist. Then he started pushing me and now he hits too."

"You have to end it; you can't let him do that to you."

"I have tried, but he won't listen to me."

"Clare, listen to me, please," Eli begged, "he will listen if I'm protecting you. I won't let him near you. Neither will Alli and Adam. You won't be alone with that bastard, ever."

I knew that Fitz wouldn't let them stop him from getting to me, but I wouldn't let him know I doubted him.

I looked into his emerald eyes and smiled, "Okay."

**

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Ohhh snap! **

**Reviews will keep me happy. So please do it of a depressive person!**

**Long one make me feel all bubbly on the inside.**

**Next Chapter:**

**"Is anyone there? Hello!"**

**"Eli, help me," i whispered.**


	7. When the Going Gets Tough

A/N: follow me on tumblr : arcofarousal

Sorry for slow updates, life not to great. I'll be fine.

I do not own Degrassi, but i do own a new book that smells awesome.

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**When the going gets tough.**

My heart was beating out of my chest. I couldn't sleep last night, for nightmares of Fitz kept popping into my head. Eli was sweet and understanding when he dropped me off at my dorm room and talked with Ali. Eli said he would be there when I broke up with Fitz. He wasn't going to be obvious about it, but he was going to sit in the back of the café. I dressed in long sleeves to hide the bruises and a pair of jeans. I met Ali in the kitchen and grabbed my purse and jacket.

Ali and I walked out of the dorms and onto the campus. Ali had agreed to walk me there just in case Fitz showed up and I couldn't make it to the café.

"Alli, I'm not sure I can do this. Even with you, Eli, and Adam protecting me he could still hurts me, or even worse one of you. I don't want to put you guys in any type of danger."

Alli gave me a look of disbelief, "Clare, you have no say in what we do. If we want to protect you from that psycho, let us. Beside we are all going to be okay, after you get out of that toxic relationship."

I sighed as I realized she was right. There was no way around this. As we approached the café, I felt bile gather in my throat. I tried my best to swallow it down and appear calm. I hugged Alli good-bye once I was sure Eli was inside. I sat down at a booth and gave Eli a reassuring nod. When I looked into his deep forest eyes, I saw that he was telling me to be strong.

I ordered water and waited for Fitz to show up. After about five minutes I heard the bell ring. I knew it was Fitz, because the whole aura of the place went from friendly, to frightened. I took one last deep breath and heard him speak to me. "Good morning, my beautiful one," he said as he kissed me on the cheek. It took all my will power not to wipe it off.

"Hi, Fitz," I stated coolly as he slid into the seat across from me. I caught Eli's eye and he nodded to me. I knew this was the moment. I would finally be free after this. "Fitz, I need to tell you something," I said shyly.

I looked up at him through my bangs and he looked calm, which was good for me. "Well, go on then," he stated.

I took a deep breath ad began, "Fitz, you were a great boyfriend. Then something took over, and you became somebody I don't like. I am tired of the abuse, I don't deserve it. That's why we are through. Do not try and talk to me, just stay far away from me. It is for the best," by the end my confidence had built. I looked straight at Fitz. He looked shocked.

He reached for my hand, but I quickly retracted it. "Clare, I know you don't mean that. I mean, sure we fight sometimes, but what couple doesn't. We are perfect for each other. You can't just give up on that," his eyes were pleading.

I quickly shook my head. "I refuse to stick around for the abuse that you put me through, and I think this is a good time for you to leave. Good-bye Fitz."

He gave me a hard glare and I wanted to flinch. However, I chocked back the urge and stood my ground. I refused to be pushed around. "Fine, but you are making a huge mistake. Trust me," Fitz said as he stormed out of the café.

A weight was lifted off my shoulders. I finally felt like I could stand tall and be happy now. Eli made his way over to me with a smirk present on his lips. I rolled my eyes, that smirk will never go away. I think he actually sleeps like that too.

"I take it that it went well," he asked hopefully.

I gave a small laugh and said, "It sure did. He tried to get me to forgive him, but I stood up to him and said enough is enough."

"Clare, I am so proud of you. I promise that I won't let him get near you again. I will be there to protect you."

"Thank you, Elijah."

We got up from the booth and he walked me back to my room. On the way there I sighed in contentment. We talked about things, as if we never had a falling out. Things finally felt right. We made it to my door and he pulled me into him. The hug felt amazing; I can't believe I ever forgot my feelings for him. Eli is perfect!

"Good night, blue eyes," Eli said as he looked into my eyes. I couldn't keep the blush from coming.

"Night, _Elijah_," I stated mockingly.

I walked into my room, and smiled in content.

* * *

**2 months later**

Things were going great. Fitz had left me alone and I finally felt safe being by myself. Eli was still always around watching over me. Although, I think he might be doing something else then protecting me. I am almost positive Eli likes me back. Whenever I see him butterflies go crazy in my stomach. The littlest things make me blush, like when we accidentally brush hands or lock eyes.

Today was Friday. Eli was taking me off campus to a steak house for a nice dinner. I am already nervous. I asked Alli if this counted as a date and she said yes. I find myself agreeing, but I can never be too sure. Bad things have a habit of happening to me. Alli was out with Drew for the night so I had to rely on myself to get ready. It shouldn't be too hard considering Alli already picked out my clothes.

I walked to the bathroom with my toiletries and towel. The halls were eerie; it's like a ghost town. I got to the bathroom and headed into one of the shower stalls. I got undressed and stepped under the hot spray. I closed my eyes and let my body relax from a long week of school. As I was getting lost in my thoughts i heard something. It was probably someone coming out of their room. I continued with my shower quickly so I could have enough time to get ready. I wrapped up in my towel and made my way back to my room. As I was unlocking my door I heard someone down the hall. I turned to the source of the noise only to come up blank. No one was around. "Hello?" I called out, "Is there anyone there? Hello." I listened for someone to reply, but all I got was silence. I shrugged and walked into my room.

As I shut my door I could shake this weird feeling. Something in my room felt off. I looked around, but nothing seemed to be off. I turned on some music and began getting ready. I let my curling iron heat up as I got my outfit on. I looked in the mirror and was pleased with my appearance. I sat down at my vanity only to jump. Loud music began to blast from my speakers as an unfamiliar song filled the room. Eli must have taken the liberty of updating my iPod. I rolled my eyes and turned off my music.

I sat back down and tried to relax. My heart was pumping fast. Something wasn't right, I started to get ready again in the silence. I felt like someone was watching me. I grabbed my phone and called Eli.

RING! RING! RING!

"Come on Eli, pick up the phone!" I yelled getting worried.

"Hey, it's Eli; you know what to do- BEEP!"

Great his voicemail. "Hey Eli, its Clare when you get this call me. It isn't anything big, but something feels off. Like I'm being watched. I'm probably just being paranoid," I paused and took a deep breath. I looked into the mirror and gasped. _FITZ! _"Eli, help me," I whispered. "Eli can't help you now, I told you it was a mistake." Everything went black.

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**A/N: Cue the creepy music. **

**Thanks for the reviews you guys are awesome blossoms! Keep it up I enjoy it.**

**Next chapter will be Eli's and Clare's POV**

**I had to get there. I promised I would protect her and I will. My heart is pumping out of my chest as my feet carry me faster than I have ever gone. I can't let him hurt the girl I love.**

**The pain in my stomach was unbearable. My breathing became shallow; I looked up and mutter, "I love you." Before, the blackness took over my senses.**


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